I have long felt that we Americans (US) are overly preoccupied with creating a positive mental attitude. In fact in some circles like business and athletics a positive mental attitude (PMA) is a means to the ultimate performance in that profession. For those living alternative lifestyles, especially those involved in alternative healing methods, PMA can be the actual foundation upon which their lives are built. I have always thought this to be psychologically unhealthy. And now it seems that others...
The Tail is Wagging the Dog
How can you end problems and find personal inner peace? Will changing your behavior results in inner peace? Asking “why” you behave in a certain way will only lead to more “whys.” Answering “why” will have you chasing your tail. You will think you are getting somewhere but in the end you will have only exhausted yourself, or at the very least become quite dizzy. Even if you catch your tail, what have you caught? The tail is attached to...
The Sword and the Leaf
My father was a warrior by profession and by deed. He fought in World War II, Korea and fought twice in the jungles of Viet Nam. He was not a very religious man but he was especially spiritual. In this regard he aligned more with the code of Bushido, the code of honor developed among the samurai, the military warriors of Japan. During World War II while fighting in the Pacific theater my father came by a katana, a samurai...
It Is What It Is (Part II)
To ask why things are the way they are reflects a desire to see beyond your slice of life, and know the primal mind and ultimate makeup of the universe. Somehow we feel that if we can understand the cosmic mind we will then understand our own. From there it should be a short leap to fixing the wrongs of our life and then we can live in peace and harmony. While a noble undertaking it is completely fruitless and...
It Is What It Is (Part I)
Some years ago when I worked in an office I was having lunch with a colleague and the conversation got around to troubles at work. He began describing the problem people and the negative circumstances they created. He was frustrated that he could not perform his job as he felt it should be carried out. I saw his point and agreed with him, citing my own grievances and how I also felt restricted. Then, because of decades of “spiritual” training...
You Can’t Grow in Unbounded Love
Why? Why can't we maintain the intensity of those early days of romantic love? (The Romantic Relationship) Because romantic love is conditional love and we humans were built for a much grander adventure. Even the more mature love that builds between two people over a lifetime is largely dependent on conditions. In the beginning of such a relationship we may feel that if we are honest and open with the other person. We feel that if we work together we...
Who’s in Charge? (Part I)
(Let me say at the outset of this article that it may touch a little on the technical and even if you have zero interest in neuroscience or quantum physics I encourage you to skip easily over any part that befuddles or bores you and read this article to its conclusion. The implications are staggering!) I just finished reading a fascinating book by neuroscientist Michael S. Gazzaniga called, Who’s in Charge?: Free Will and the Science of the Brain. Gazzaniga...
Where Have All the Children Gone?
I taught a workshop in Hamburg, Germany last weekend on relationships. I made the point that before we can love another we must first love our self. The deepest expression of self-love is when we become aware of our Eufeeling. Once we become aware of Eufeeling however we still have to work within the relationship have to work within the relationship to make it “fit” with our partner. This requires attention to a number of areas but to make it...
They Are Among Us (Part II)
Knowing that we are not complete is the first step to becoming whole. We feel it bubble up from deep inside when we are very quiet. It is a feeling of incompleteness, a sense that something is missing. One way we often try to drown out that uneasy feeling is by becoming busy, very busy. The more that feeling of emptiness tries to poke its meddlesome head into our conscious business the more we work to trample it under the...
They Are Among Us (Part I)
They are among us. They look like us, speak our language, eat our foods, and work alongside us. Unless you know what to look for you will miss them. They are rare but they are there. These people have made the transition to adulthood and not lost the innocence, joy and power of childhood. These exceptional people are content as they are, where they are. They are more responsive to beauty. They are less driven by egocentric needs and more...
